Trash Talking...

G

grimsauce

New Member
I haven't been around CGA for quite some time, although I 100% support everything that this community stands for and the people here.

Anyways, I've been playing a lot of League of Legends... It's a really fun game, highly competitive, and highly team oriented. Also, it is ridden with trash talkers.

I don't have a lot of "big sins" that I find myself committing at this point in my walk... however, almost every time that I look in retrospect at the way I handled myself with trash talkers, I am convicted that I don't handle it correctly 9 out of 10 times.

I was curious as to what you guys think are the best ways to deal with trash talkers. The people that will boast at every kill or every one of your mistakes... saying things like "U MAD!?" or "CRY?" They are utterly frustrating if you let them get to you, especially if you're trying really hard!

I know that sometimes, maybe even most of the time, not saying anything and ignoring it is the correct route. But I don't think being quiet an entire game is really showing the love of Christ like saying something beneficial could.

Maybe I can simply try to be an encouragement, giving genuine congratulations to people when they do something well- even if it is killing me? I think my problem is me trying to passive-aggressive attack them. Anyways, I'll stop blabbering... I'm interested to hear what you guys think... maybe how you struggle with it or ways that you deal with it.

thanks,
Kyle
 
I think there is a line when trash talking becomes a fun banter when playing (mutual respect) and degrades to spiteful and hurtful.
 
Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

You might try turning the situation around. Often, if you show some respect to the offending player they will respect you in turn (not 100% of the time). For instance, if they obliterate you then lose gracefully. Congratulate them on their win, and/or praise their skill.

Granted, playing games on the internet is much like going to jr. high (a large percentage are of that age group after all). Everyone is looking to prove themselves to a bunch of other people who are looking to prove themselves while not caring about you proving yourself. If you can work in that type of environment then have at it.
 
grimsauce said:
I don't have a lot of "big sins" that I find myself committing at this point in my walk... however, almost every time that I look in retrospect at the way I handled myself with trash talkers, I am convicted that I don't handle it correctly 9 out of 10 times.
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Grimsauce,

Not to sound negative towards you at all, but there is no such thing as big and little sins. In the eyes of God, Sin is Sin. No matter how big or small we think it to be. Just wanted to warn you as a brother in Christ to watch out for trying to justify any sin in your life...





Maybe I can simply try to be an encouragement, giving genuine congratulations to people when they do something well- even if it is killing me? I think my problem is me trying to passive-aggressive attack them. Anyways, I'll stop blabbering... I'm interested to hear what you guys think... maybe how you struggle with it or ways that you deal with it.

thanks,
Kyle
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I really like this idea here. Congratulating people who do manage to kill you. Return kindness for their rebuttals towards your play style.
In the many situations I have faced with this, (playing Counter Strike mostly) I simply replied nicely back to them most of the time or I was quiet and ignored it.

And then, here's the most fun part.

Pray for them.

Yes, pray for them. :D It doesn't sound like much, but just saying a short prayer (And I made up this tag so please don't think I'm pointing out a particular player)

"Lord, please let me show your love to knight dragon 65698. I think he is having a bad day because he is trash talking a lot more than usual. Give me the opportunity to witness to him and bless him in your name."

Now you don't have to say that over the mic, but if you keep it up, things will change.
 
Excellent advice - pray for those who persecute you. I'm sure there were those praying for Saul - and God answered with Paul.
 
the_great_eskimo_pie said:
Not to sound negative towards you at all, but there is no such thing as big and little sins. In the eyes of God, Sin is Sin. No matter how big or small we think it to be. Just wanted to warn you as a brother in Christ to watch out for trying to justify any sin in your life...
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Actually, I don't think Scripture bears this out. While any and all sin separates us from God, the same amount of punishment doesn't seem to apply:

Matthew 11:23-24
And you, Capernaum, will you be lifted to the heavens? No, you will go down to Hades. For if the miracles that were performed in you had been performed in Sodom, it would have remained to this day. 24 But I tell you that it will be more bearable for Sodom on the day of judgment than for you.”

John 19:11
Jesus answered, “You would have no power over me if it were not given to you from above. Therefore the one who handed me over to you is guilty of a greater sin.”

Luke 12:47-48
“The servant who knows the master’s will and does not get ready or does not do what the master wants will be beaten with many blows. 48 But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.
 
In game answer:

Mute or ignore them:
/mute name
/ignore name
works for ally as well

for whole enemy team:
/ignore enemy

tupe it exactly as written
 
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Honestly that makes more sense then it sounds like. Is there any actual benefit to listening to the trash talkers? Will somehow the game go better for you had you been available to hear a specific comment from them. I assume you might miss out on a specific call to arms at baron or a mid MIA but honestly won't missing out on that be worth no hearing them? Just be super liberal with the mute/ignore and play on.
 
In order of responses:

Lloren- I think you may be right on this... however, the gray area makes it dangerous territory. Once someone starts to get frustrated, it becomes an intent at dealing a blow with words, not patting them on the back playfully

Patriot- thanks, I feel like thats some good advice

Eskimo- I'm going to have to agree with Patriot, otherwise I wouldn't have worded it like that. I am not fine with "sin," but a physical choice to look at pornography, bring others down, etc. is quite different to me than a slight feeling of pride in my heart that reflects on my voice. I classify sin as big or little. The big stuff is easy to identify and form ways to beat it, the little stuff is a lot harder to address and hides itself a lot. Hints of pride, lust, etc are things that are harder for me to identify and address.
ANYWAYS, thanks for the words. A short prayer is a good idea- for myself as well.

Eraser/Ewok- I feel like if it comes between shaming Christ's name with them unmuted or glorifying Christ with them muted, then I'll choose muted. However, blocking people from communication is something I seldom like to do. I desire to take advantage of my opportunities in games to talk to people, not to mention I am very social, so I think muting/ignoring is one of the least appealing options.

thanks for your responses all
 
Re: Patriot

I just wanted to point out a good catch on the "no big/little sin" issue. I think that's one of those aphorisms that circulate so long in Christian culture that we come to take it as truth.

(That's not to detract from Eskimo's point that we don't justify our sin. True. Or from Grimsauce's point that we watch out for the sneaky "little" sins not just the "big" obvious ones. True as well. Good discussion all around.)
 
First, to Grim: It's tough, but just mentally ignoring them (you can leave them unblocked in actual chat) is probably one of the hardest, but seemingly most feasible options for you. Paul wrote that we should "let no unwholesome thing come out of your mouth" (Eph 4:29). I think the same standard applies to the written word. Jesus taught that it is not what goes into a man that makes him unclean, but what comes out of him (Mark 7:15).

I take those verses as a call to not participate in the give-and-take of trash talking.

Patriot, Brydon, and others: I understand your point. However, the idea of us classifying our sins as big and little can lure us into a false sense of security in our sin. It leads us to judgment of others, which is clearly not our domain. However, read 1 Corinthians 5:11-13 very carefully. I would encourage you to read the entire chapter, as context is very important. However, it is a call on personal conduct as well as communal health.

If someone were to claim that trash-talking was acceptable because it is a "little thing" and refuses to accept that it is a sinful attitude... Paul was clear about what the next steps after counseling are.
 
Those verses seem to say that we are not to judge non-Christians, that is God's duty. We are however to judge sin in each other's lives (Christian family) Correct? I know there are other verses that seem to say we are never to judge someone's motives/heart as we can't know it, but we are to judge obvious sin in a brother.
 
And hence why I talked about the context being very important. Within a community of Christians, we are called to help encourage each other, and if necessary, correct each other. It's impossible to help do those things without assessing what areas they need to change.

Sorry, I'm at work and had to leave on a call. I didn't get a chance to completely flesh out my thoughts on my previous post.
 
Generally when faced with random people yelling obscenities etc. I normally play along. Nothing is more hilarious than agreeing youre a noob after killing someone....

Think about it... a "pro" just admitted to being killed by someone who is of "inferior skill"

Conversely if you die its like they just punched a baby and took his bottle. So its hilarious either way.

Always keep this in mind most of the people who play things like LoL find their identity in it and the game is now plain idolatry. I vote for making fun of them for it at every turn. I mean we do have someone who practically did the same thing....1 kings 18:21
 
Durruck said:
Patriot, Brydon, and others: I understand your point. However, the idea of us classifying our sins as big and little can lure us into a false sense of security in our sin.
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As I stated in my original post, "any and all sin separates us from God." I'm not looking to justify sins because they are little, I am merely pointing out that Scripture seems to indicate that there are different degrees of severity in sin. As Scripture seems to be saying that there are different levels of sin, I will continue to claim such because I don't think it wise to gloss over what Scripture says to protect people from a possible false sense of security.

Durruck said:
It leads us to judgment of others, which is clearly not our domain. However, read 1 Corinthians 5:11-13 very carefully. I would encourage you to read the entire chapter, as context is very important. However, it is a call on personal conduct as well as communal health.
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I'm not sure what you are trying to say here. Please clarify.

Durruck said:
If someone were to claim that trash-talking was acceptable because it is a "little thing" and refuses to accept that it is a sinful attitude... Paul was clear about what the next steps after counseling are.
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I don't think anyone was trying to say that little sins are okay.
 
Patriot, Brydon, and others: I understand your point. However, the idea of us classifying our sins as big and little can lure us into a false sense of security in our sin.
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Agreed: False sense of security = bad.

However, the truth remains the truth. Punching a man in the face is not as bad as shooting a man in the face. Both (may) come from a sinful heart that separates us from God, but one is (may be) easier to mend than the other.

Eskimo Pie stated that there are no big and little sins in the eyes of God. Patriot showed from Jesus' statements that this is not the case. OUR feelings and concerns don't trump that. (We could debate the interpretation or context or the balance of scripture, but we would have to do THAT.)

We can worry about where something MIGHT lead us... But anything in the Bible can be misapplied and lead us into heresy if we're not instructed by the whole word of God and directed by his Spirit.

For what it's worth, I think you're missing the thrust of Grimsauce's earlier statement. I don't think he was calling something a "little sin" to be dismissive, but to be vigilant. For example, very few of us will ever have to worry about lions in our kitchen. Some of us may have to defend against rats in our kitchen. Both are unacceptable. Only one is likely to happen without us noticing it.
 
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