Please pray for my Mother.

The Mighty Gerbil

The Mighty Gerbil

Tribe of Judah TF 2 Chapter Leader & CGA Admin
Staff member
We are going to have to call 911 to send my mother to the hospital (though she does not want to). Please pray for her. For the past 30+ years she's been sick but she's become irrational and immobile for the last day. She's not gotten any decent sleep or food and her Lymphedema is out of control bloating her entire body to a new extreme. To much can put pressure on your heart and kill you. Even under normal conditions she cannot sleep lying down as fluids get into her lungs. In addition to the Lymphedema she has Crest syndrome, type 1 diabetes, gastroparesis, glaucoma, and thyroid issues that I know about.
 
Praying for your mother right now.

Dear God, you are the One who heals and restores. We pray and ask that you would heal Gerbil's mother and bring her peace of mind. We pray that you would make your presence clearly known to Gerbil, his mother, and his father during this very difficult time. We pray and ask that you would give her care team wisdom and discernment to treat these issues quickly and effectively and safely.

We pray these things in the name of your Son, Jesus, the Prince of Peace. Amen.
 
I’m so sorry to hear that Gerbil. I am, and will continue to pray for you all.
I pray for peace for you and your father, healing for your mother, and rest for you all.


19 Remember my affliction and my wanderings, the wormwood and the gall! 20 My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me. 21 But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: 22 The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; 23 they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 24 “The LORD is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.” 25 The LORD is good to those who wait for him, to the soul who seeks him.
Lamentations 3:19-25
 
She's gone. She was gone before they arrived. Her blood sugars were not low and we didn't even know Lymphedema could kill you until a couple hours before. I blame the HOA for having to fight to repair our house to remove the mold that got her sick(er). I blame our inept welfare system for deleting the file, when told specifically not to, that her insurance worked on leaving her without Medicare and resources since April. I blame her for fighting every inch of the way to keep us from bringing the people to save her life into her "clean" house. I blame myself for not defying her and pushing to bring them in quicker. I blame having to fight "christians" on having to fight on Biblical things so basic, so black and red, that my non-existent confidence never got better. That is what I came to Toj for all those years ago thinking I would learn and grow in confidence in Christ here, what a joke, I didn't expect to have to be the one with a backbone.

Prisoner for 35~ years, leaving the house or bathing once every 4 years, never having a friend, all for her. I never resented her for that I was only angry she didn't take better care of herself over being "clean", a lesson in vanity. Angry at myself for not learning anything via computer too, all those wasted years. For my Father it's even worse his whole life was caring for her. That was in addition to being on the phone 9-5 fighting insurance, Fema, doctors, and the HOA. He hasn't gotten more than a few hours sleep for the past few days, I don't think he even can sleep right now. I pray he doesn't have a heart attack or something. I got some sleep earlier but now I wonder if I try to sleep will I have hallucinations like when my Grandmother died. They aren't fun. Now we only have each other left (and God), every other relative is dead. I don't know how to live but I guess it's time to learn to drive, get a job, and be an adult, even a lazy and inept one. IDK if I will make Tuesday. IDK much of anything that will happen from here on out except I'm not doing much between now and then. Don't expect cheery spam at the least. Whatever, bring it world I will not abandon the truth in Christ the only hope anyone can have.
 
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Gee, I'm sorry Gerbil. I know what it's like to lose people you love like I lost both my grandfathers from Medical issues. My father's father died of old age and medical issues in 2012-13, and my mother's father died from a blood clot and medical complications in 2017. In 2017, when I came back from school, Grandpa was dead and I was upset but I then realized I don't have to worry about him or my other Grandfather that they're perfectly fine now up there with the Father. As I also promised to protect Grandpa's family, beholding my mother and nana, I would also behold my father and his mother. Again, I'm sorry for your loss and how it came to that. Always remember. Alive or not, your family will be with you in spirit for Jesus said in Matthew before dying "Mary, behold your son. John, behold your mother", that when the end of days come, you will see her again. Jesus is still here with you, with all of us. So I say to you, behold your family in spirit. Amen, I'll pray for you and your mother that you will both find peace, Gerbil.
 
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I’m so sorry Gerbil.
No matter how much I dearly wish I could, I know there is nothing I can say that will take away the pain and anger. Just know that you and Bird are in my prayers.
I know this hasn’t been, and won’t be, easy in any way, shape, or form. If you need someone to talk to, or even just to have someone listen to a rant so you can get it out of your system, I’m here.
Take the time to grieve in your own way, don’t rush yourself into doing more than you absolutely have to. I pray that you and Bird can get some much needed rest.

I know it can sometimes feel hurtful when people try to give you scripture as a way of minimizing grief, so I hope this coveys it’s intended purpose of hope amidst the pain and not a dismissing of the pain you feel right now.

“50 I tell you this, brothers: flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable.
51 Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed,
52 in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed.
53 For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality.
54 When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written: “Death is swallowed up in victory.”
55 “O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?”
56 The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.
57 But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
58 Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.”

With all the love I can convey over text, please take care of yourselves as best you can my brother in Christ
 
I'm so sorry, Gerbil. I lost my mom to cancer when I was in my 30s. It sucks. Rely on God, our only hope, and He will get you through it. Take time for yourself, at least as much as you can. Dealing with stuff after someone has passed is no fun and just adds to the hurt, so try and take time to be by yourself and just meditate on God.
 
The road ahead may be difficult, but take it one step at a time, knowing that the Lord is with you every moment. And though you face many unknowns now, do not allow guilt to consume you. Lean onto Christ, and do not isolate yourself, for in community, we find healing. We are here for you in both prayer and presence.

May God grant you peace, strength, and His eternal comfort.
 
I had mentioned on Discord that I kept trying to find the right words to share and was struggling to say something that I thought might be helpful or meaningful, so I went and searched for relevant Bible verses instead and this passage captured my attention:

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too." 2 Corinthians 1:3-5, ESV

My family and I will continue praying for you and your dad, Gerbil.
 
The Mighty Gerbil said:
She's gone. She was gone before they arrived. Her blood sugars were not low and we didn't even know Lymphedema could kill you until a couple hours before. I blame the HOA for having to fight to repair our house to remove the mold that got her sick(er). I blame our inept welfare system for deleting the file, when told specifically not to, that her insurance worked on leaving her without Medicare and resources since April. I blame her for fighting every inch of the way to keep us from bringing the people to save her life into her "clean" house. I blame myself for not defying her and pushing to bring them in quicker. I blame having to fight "christians" on having to fight on Biblical things so basic, so black and red, that my non-existent confidence never got better. That is what I came to Toj for all those years ago thinking I would learn and grow in confidence in Christ here, what a joke, I didn't expect to have to be the one with a backbone.

Prisoner for 35~ years, leaving the house or bathing once every 4 years, never having a friend, all for her. I never resented her for that I was only angry she didn't take better care of herself over being "clean", a lesson in vanity. Angry at myself for not learning anything via computer too, all those wasted years. For my Father it's even worse his whole life was caring for her. That was in addition to being on the phone 9-5 fighting insurance, Fema, doctors, and the HOA. He hasn't gotten more than a few hours sleep for the past few days, I don't think he even can sleep right now. I pray he doesn't have a heart attack or something. I got some sleep earlier but now I wonder if I try to sleep will I have hallucinations like when my Grandmother died. They aren't fun. Now we only have each other left (and God), every other relative is dead. I don't know how to live but I guess it's time to learn to drive, get a job, and be an adult, even a lazy and inept one. IDK if I will make Tuesday. IDK much of anything that will happen from here on out except I'm not doing much between now and then. Don't expect cheery spam at the least. Whatever, bring it world I will not abandon the truth in Christ the only hope anyone can have.
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Make no mistake, Gerbil. Your mom's not gone, she will live again in God's "New Era". As for the devils that tried to destroy your spirit and the spirits of those who lost loved ones like me, they will share Satan's fate when the end of days comes so don't give up now.
 
A few days ago, I created a GoFundMe for Gerbil and his dad.

EDIT: Out of respect for Gerbil's and Bird's privacy, I've removed the direct link to the GoFundMe campaign. (I did not realize that the campaign would make full names public and I apologize for not thinking that through.) If you are interested in donating, please send me a forums DM or contact me directly on Discord and I can share the link privately.

If you are able, please consider donating. Regardless whether you donate or not, please continue to pray for Gerbil and Bird.
 
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