Too funny...... :D

[Priceless3110]

These were emailed to me and I thought I would share.

Calls to Computer "Tech Support"


TECH SUPPORT

Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just doesn't work. What am I doing wrong?
Tech support: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive, right?
Customer: Yeah....
Tech support: And what sort of computer are you using?
Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises. Listen.....
Tech support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!

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Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...

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Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No .. Wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... Sorry....

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Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?

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Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, ******oops*******oops*******oops*******oops* it!

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Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

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Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.


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Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

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Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work

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Tech support: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

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Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.

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Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

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Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

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Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

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A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."

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And last but not least:....


Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!

 

[the_great_eskimo_pie]

LOL!!! How come some people can be so silly when it comes to computers?


Here is another one for you ( It happend to me Dad hehe)

A Major was working on his computer, when he was trying to transfer files from one computer to another, the connection was slow. (THe Network was rather busy at the time.) So he called Tech support. They sent a Tech guy out. The Tech looked at what the Major was doing and tried not to laugh. He showed the Major where the computer plugged into the Cat5 and explained that having the cable coiled, was not the best idea. "You see, Computers speak in Binary, that is 1's and 0's and while the zero's can make the corners in the cable rather easily, the 1's tend to get stuck. So just make sure you straighten your cable out every day to let the ones slide through easier." The Major nodded sagely and thanked the tech guy. He went back to the office and told the story to his co-workers. They all had a good laugh. But not the last.


A few days later, Same building, The tech guy was called out again, as he passed by differant offices, he saw people making sure that their network cable was straight.

hehe. Some people...

 

[Priceless3110]

LOL. Here is one I heard that happened to another homeschool mom's old boss.

Her boss got a new monitor for her computer and she looked at my friend and said "how do I get the information from the old monitor to the new one?". My friend just shook her head. LOL.