As your wife descends the stairs, you remember your pee trap. You start to set it up at the entrance to the Dining Room when you remember that the cooldown on this trap can be anywhere from 2 to 8 hours, depending on your fluid intake.
Creak...
You decide that this could be put to better use on something else, and carefully disassemble the trap and return it's components to your inventory. Besides, you're pretty sure it will work.
Creak...
How many stairs do you have again?
Creak...
>You hear a hissing sound nearby. Followed by frantic scurrying.
What was that?
You crouch back down by the sliding door. You hear something like a hiss coming from the darkness. You lean out a little further to hear better, and the instant you do, you hear the rustle of something scurrying away!
Creak...
>cast magic missile into the darkness.
You can't tell if the thing has run away, or is still lurking in the backyard.
Stupid motion detector light.
What you wouldn't give for some sort of magic missile right now. You rifle through your [Light Backpack]. You guess your [Crusty Plunger] is about as close to a magic missile as you are going to get.
You stand upright and wield your [Crusty Plunger] like an Olympic javelin thrower. With a grunt Thrall himself would be proud of, you hurl your missile out into the darkness, hoping it's direct hit or it's subsequent AOE will get some sort of reaction.
Success! You hear a muffled squeal, a few seconds of struggling, and then silence.
...silence?
A
Creak...less silence.
The glory of your triumphant [Crusty Plunger] throw is immediately squelched by the presence you feel in the room behind you. You slowly turn and look to the doorway. Your wife is standing there, mouth agape as she takes in all that has happened to her dining room. You start to recite your dining room excuse when you hear a bloodcurdling scream. She takes off, running back upstairs and slamming the door behind her. Only then do you remember what you look like. Face painted, [Barbed Bat], [Pink Spiky Shield]... let's be honest - if you met yourself in the darkness, you'd scream and run too.
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CHARACTER SCREEN:
You are wielding [Pink Spiky Shield].
You are wielding [Barbed Bat].
You are wearing [Gym Shorts].
You are wearing [Black Winter Hat].
You are wearing [Tacky Tie].
You are wearing [Wedding Ring].
You are wearing [Light Backpack] (8 slots filled/10 available).
Your health is at 95%
Your energy is at 50%
You are Intimidating.
INVENTORY:
You have two (2) [Plastic Coat Hanger].
You have one (1) [Ink Pen].
You have one (1) [Bottle of Urine].
You have one (1) [Shower Curtain].
You have one (1) [Tube of Toothpaste].
You have two (2) [Toothbrush].
You have one (1) [Nail Nippers].
You have one (1) [Can of Hairspray].
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